Haunted
by Empathic Frost
Summary: A different prospective on Remy's Empathy. -Slight- Rogue/Remy undertones


I own none of these characters; as they belong to Marvel (A pity.)  
  
HAUNTED By: Frost Ba da pa pa ba da pa pa...  
  
Come here  
  
Pretty please  
  
I hold my hand out to the figure in the darkness. Despite the fact that I know him-I have for years, I feel hesitant. I don't know why. I just do. Something is wrong with him, and I can feel it. I think he knows that too. He senses my hesitance and stays in the shadows. I curse myself for letting it show, and for not hiding my feelings better. He's an empath, damn it, I should have known better.  
  
"We haven't got time for this!" I chide, and hold my hand out again. We really haven't got time for it-we're in trouble-all of us. Our team, the X- Men are in trouble. I bite my lower lip, trying my hardest to block out the thoughts of what I'd already seen on this night. So much death, Jean is gone, as well as Scott. He'd gotten careless after Jean died. Samuel is gone, and Jubilee-who'd hardly had time to live a life, is just as dead as the rest of them. Oh, god.I feel the worst for Remy, though. He can sense it all-all that pain and death. He felt it when they died. Just like he can feel all our fear now, all our pain; Mental and physical. It must be driving him insane.  
  
"Remy, please.." I hold my hand out further. We have to go, we have to retreat! This is madness, a war we could never win. We've lost so much today already-I can't bear thinking of anyone else dying. I can see him trembling in the shadows, those crimson depths holding so much fear and pain that they're almost on fire. He must sense my urgency though, because he finally reaches out with a shaking hand-I'd never realized how thin he really is, and I don't know why between all the chaos that I'm noticing it now, either. "C'mon," I urge gently, as I grab his hand and start tugging him in the direction we need to go. "We have to get out of here!"  
  
He doesn't reply, and the look in his eyes tells me that he isn't ready to talk. Me? I've got a wide gash in my side, I hope to god it isn't fatal-it doesn't feel that bad right now, and I hope it stays that way. It's slowing me down a little, but some of the others are holding the danger at bay-I'd been assigned to gather up the wounded survivors. .There are none; only Remy, who looks dazed, and a little lost, but otherwise uninjured. It isn't like him to run from a fight, and I can't help but wonder what's affecting him that badly. He doesn't even seem to notice where he is as I drag him along. Please let Hank be alive once we get out, he's the only one that can help us now.  
  
Can you tell me where I am  
  
You won't you say something  
  
I need to get my bearings  
  
I took his hand, and now he's leading me to God knows where. I don' care. my head hurts so badly. it's 'nough to make me wish I could pass out. But I can' 'llow it, if I did, deir suffering would be worse. De battle was a slaughter, we had no chance. my mind aches so terribly, I could feel dem dyin'. I still can. We have no chance, an' escape seems less an' less possible. At least dat's what Bobby is feelin'. He's draggin' me 'long, an' my mind is so clouded it's hard t'tell up from down. But as hard as he's tryin' t'hide dose feelings, he's desp'rate; he doesn't t'ink we'll make it. I hope he isn't right.  
  
It's getting' hard for bot' of us t'run, he's goin' slower dan normal- conservin' his energy, and I can hardly concentrate on not trippin' over my own feet as we go. I'd like to pull my mind 'way, force my shields back into position. But what kind of friend would dat make me? If I can take deir pain, I will. I urge him t'stop for a minute, not by speaking, but tuggin' softly at his hand. He understands, an' we move into de shadows a li ttle.  
  
"We can't stop," he tells me softly, "we have to get out.." He doesn't understand what I'm doin', why I'm stalling. I can' tell him; he'd ask me t'stop; t'not be so noble. I'm not bein' noble, I've caused enough pain in my lifetime, an' any I can take away from ot'ers helps.jus' a little.  
  
I'm lost  
  
And the shadows keep on changing  
  
"Remy, please!" I try so hard to keep the whine out of my voice as he sinks into the shadow with me, as he leans against the wall and takes a deep breath. What the hell is wearing him out like this? I decide it's okay to give him his moment, I think I could use a little break from the running too. The wound in my side throbs-not really painfully, but enough for me to notice-and I wish that I could go to ice; it would help the pain. I know I can't right now, I've got to save the powers I have left just in case I have to fight.  
  
I let my eyes wander around our surroundings. A city block that's so torn up none of the buildings are really left standing. Rubble covers as much of the ground as blood and bodies do. These people were innocents.. And in the distance I can still see the figures of the X-Men; fighting for their lives and the lives of the innocents who had already died.. -Hurry up and retreat already! - I urge them silently, fearing the worst. The blackbird was farther off; and it's where we need to go. And fast.  
  
I can only hope that we'll all get there around the same time. It would break all our hearts if we had to leave someone behind. I shake my head, and try my hardest to think happier thoughts. We'll get out of here alive.and it'll all be okay. Ice cream cones. the first snowfall of the year. happy thoughts. It's time to go, and so I take his hand into mine again; he's unnaturally cold, and when I look at him, I note he's pale. .There's nothing I can do about that right now. I just hope it's nothing serious. "Remy?" I ask, trying to coax him out of some thought that obviously occupied all his mind and energy. "Why are you shaking? Remy? We have to go." I don't even wait for an answer as I drag him along the ways of the shadow. I'm secretly glad he doesn't answer me, I'm too afraid to hear what it is he's thinking of.I don't think I want to know why he's biting his lip that way.why his eyes are shining with tears unshed.  
  
I don't want to know what Remy is going through because I know I wouldn't be able to handle it.  
  
And I'm haunted  
  
By the lives that I have loved  
  
And actions I have hated  
  
I'm haunted  
  
By the lives that wove the web  
  
Inside my haunted head  
  
  
  
I almost let out a sob as I feel anot'er life screaming out in pain.and slip away slowly. Dat life was Katherine's. Dis isn' fair; she had so much goin' for her.so much compassion an' joy. She was stronger dan I'll ever be in some respects. Oh, Mon Dieu.I bite my lip as hard as I can an' am almost relieved t'find de warm coppery taste inside my mouth. Almost. I'm bleedin'; and dat means I'm still alive. I shouldn' be. I should be out dere. fightin' wit' dem all; even if dat means deat'. I don' care dat I could die; I don' wanna be de last one alive. I don' wanna become de Witness.  
  
But right now, I'm fightin' de best way I can. I'm takin' away dier pain. It's all I c'n do wit' dese empathic powers of mine.an' it seems more effective dan de charge power.. I really don' t'ink Bobby would be able t'stomach de pain an' run at de same time if I wasn't takin' it away from him. It's hard, t'ough. I'm findin' it harder an' harder t'keep up wit him, as slow as he's goin', and de sharp stabbin' at my brain ain' lettin' up.. And den dere's dis -flash-! It hurts more dan all de ot'ers have.. Oh.my Stormy. I can feel her life drainin' away...an' I can't do not'ing to help her, but send her some feelings of love. 'Least she won't be alone when she dies.  
  
Somehow, dis doesn't reassure me. She's dead now, my best friend. The most noble of us all has died tragically in battle, an' de most I can say is dat I tried givin' her happy t'oughts as she died! I couldn't even be next to her, to help her out. an' I hate myself for it. I can feel de sobs starting; tears running down my cheeks, and I try my hardest to jus' keep my concentration on -my- mission. T'stop de pain of ot'ers.but my pain leaks t'rough all dat..and there's no way I can stop dat.  
  
Ba da pa pa ba da pa pa...  
  
Don't cry,  
  
There's always a way  
  
Here in November in this house of leaves  
  
We'll pray  
  
Please, I know it's hard to believe  
  
To see a perfect forest  
  
Through so many splintered trees  
  
You and me  
  
And these shadows keep on changing  
  
He stumbled, and I had to grab his wrist hard to keep him on his feet and running. Remy, who was so graceful and so cocky tripping? What's going on here? I chance looking back, and almost stumble myself as I see his tears. Instead of stumbling, I stop. We're so close to the Blackbird now; just a few feet away really. And the fighting is so near to us. No one but us has managed to escape I notice. Things really aren't looking good, but I have to be optimistic. Just a little distance away, I see Rogue fighting and can't help but smile a little. She's still taunting, even now, I can see her smirking and yelling something that's probably degrading to an enemy.  
  
Remy seems to notice too, I guess.. His tears are starting to dry a little, but he can't seem to make himself smile. Those eyes of his are haunting to look at, glazed over and trying their hardest to pay attention to two things at once. I know the scene is a bad one to think of, and worse to watch, but now that we're stopped, it makes me wonder.. Why is he crying? Remy.doesn't do things like that in public. And his eyes. I can't help but ask-anything to take my mind off the dull pain burning in my side; it's bleeding still, and now I'm getting worried.  
  
"Remy." His eyes twitch away from Rogue, and he tries focusing on me. I guess that means he's paying attention. "What are you doing?" I ask finally, and am shocked as he takes a shaky little breath, and puts a hand to his temples before he answers. And when he does, his voice is strained, as if he's in a great deal of pain.  
  
"Don' know w'at y'talkin' bout, homme," he paused, trying to make his voice more clear. "Jus' doin' de same as you." But I knew what he was doing then, almost as soon as he said those first few words. It all made sense now really; he'd probably not been able to handle the feelings at first, and moved from the battle scene so that he wouldn't be killed.but as time went on, he realized it would help more taking in more of the pain, so then, only he would have to suffer. Sometimes, I forgot how good of a guy Remy LeBeau really is. Despite our differences.  
  
"Non!" My thoughts are broken with his scream and I look up just in time to see Rogue fall. Oh my god.oh my god. I can't help but panic as I watch that. She was the strongest of us all.surely she can't be dead? Remy is already racing toward her, and I'm not far behind.  
  
And I'm haunted  
  
By the lives that I have loved  
  
And actions I have hated  
  
I'm haunted  
  
By the promises I've made  
  
And others I have broken  
  
I'm haunted  
  
By the lives that wove the web  
  
Inside my haunted head  
  
I'll always want you  
  
I'll always need you  
  
I'll always love you  
  
And I will always miss you  
  
"Rogue. ma cherie. m'amour.." I stare into those eyes-eyes dat could see right t'rough me an' I know it; eyes o'de purest green. Eyes I'd grown t'love t'rough de years. "Y'gonn' be all right," I whisper to her in a choked tone. She's bleedin' t'ough! I didn' t'ink she could do dat.she's invulnerable...she's so strong. she's Rogue.  
  
She smiles softly at me, reachin' out wit' a gloved hand t'touch my cheek. De pain she's feelin! Wit dat touch I can feel it all-an' take most of it away. ..And wit' dat touch I know it's not going to be all right. She's dying, an' it'll only be a few minutes. I guess she knows that too, as she jus' asked me t'hold her. "S'gonn' be all right," I say again. "Jus' a li'l scratch." I manage to smile as she rolls her eyes at me-she's strong even now. She won't cry; she only manages to tuck her head under my chin as I hold her, and whisper out her last words. "Ah loved you."  
  
And den she's gone, but I can still feel her pain, and I still can' get over how it felt when she left.and now I can't even find de strengt' t'cry. My head is swimmin' in my own pain, an' de pain of ot'ers, and I hate myself even more dan before, because I can't even cry anymore.  
  
Drake is still behind me, not saying a word. I can feel his pain and regret. his urgency behind dat. He's right, we have to go, but I can't. I'm not strong 'nough anymore, my powers are almost drained, and I don't t'ink I could walk if I wanted to. "Go, Bobby.leave me here t'do my job." I can still try.I can still take some of dat pain.  
  
  
  
Ba da pa pa ba da pa pa...  
  
Come here  
  
No I won't say please  
  
One more look at the ghost  
  
Before I'm gonna make it leave  
  
Come here  
  
I've got the pieces here  
  
Time to gather up the splinters  
  
Build a casket for my tears  
  
I can't believe he said that! Like I'm going to let him die! I shake my head, trying to hold back my own tears. My best friends are dying left and right, and I'm sure as hell not going to leave him to the same fate! The enemy is close now. I can hear them coming back; we've only got a little time. "Forget it, Remy!" He won't move as I try to tug him to his feet, instead, he falls closer to the ground, throwing up. "Jesus!" I can't help but hiss out in a frightened tone. I wish, and not for the first time, that I didn't sound so scared; that I had more confidence.  
  
Wishing isn't getting me anywhere, I can hear shouts not too far off, and I don't want to see death. I'm not going to let him see it either, and I don't care what he thinks! I scoop him up-it hurts my side to do so, but he's a lot lighter than he looks-and run. As long as we can get to the blackbird, we'll be al right, I'll call out from the comm.pick up the survivors; if there are any.  
  
"Don't worry, Remy! We're here now; we're safe!" And we are here; I made it to the blackbird with this man in my arms. Hank will be proud I can't help but think. I'm not proud though, one member out of almost a dozen? I'm glad it was that many, but I can't help but think I failed. I step inside the blackbird, and move to set Remy down in the seat; he screams though, wordlessly, and I can't help but wonder what for.  
  
And then I know; I turn quickly to see----  
  
I'm haunted  
  
(By the lives that I have loved)  
  
I'm haunted  
  
(By the promises I've made)  
  
I'm haunted  
  
By the hallways in this tiny room  
  
The echos there of me and you  
  
The voices that are carrying this tune Ba da pa pa...  
  
Bobby hit de floor wit' a dull thud an' I know dat's de end. It's over now, b'cause I'm de only one left. Dere's no one else's pain t'take in, but I still feel it inside of me.. I'm de only one left. Somehow, I've become de Witness all over 'gain, an' I can still hear deir screaming in my head, still feel all de pain dey suffered.  
  
I still can' cry, and I can only watch as de enemy approaches me. I have a card still, an' it's glowin' weakly, wit my last bit o' power.but. I don' t'ink it's wort' livin' no more. Dey're gone, and I ain' goin' to be rememberin' no good t'ings about dem any more.jus' deir screams and de pain.  
  
I let the card fizzle out, and the enemy advances-I can hardly feel de attack t'rough everyone else's pain in my head, but I know it was enough t'kill. Dey left me here t'bleed t'deat', and dat's all I can do. It really, truly is all I can do.b'cause I still..can'.cry.. But they're all cryin' in my head. 


End file.
